Comments on: comment aspirations http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/ making lives better, making better lives Thu, 09 Feb 2012 10:02:52 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.3 By: peaceful communication – problems and solutions http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-685110 peaceful communication – problems and solutions Thu, 31 Dec 2009 04:23:28 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-685110 [...] finally, the principles of right speech and appreciative communication are interesting, too – i’ve blogged about them before, and they are part of my commenting guidelines. [...] [...] finally, the principles of right speech and appreciative communication are interesting, too – i’ve blogged about them before, and they are part of my commenting guidelines. [...]

]]> By: isabella mori http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-627234 isabella mori Fri, 09 Jan 2009 06:54:22 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-627234 CJ how nice, i hope this will prove to be useful! CJ how nice, i hope this will prove to be useful!

]]> By: CJ http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-627193 CJ Thu, 08 Jan 2009 19:52:38 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-627193 We are trying out accepting comments ... and wanted to put up some positive guidelines. This was a great help! We are trying out accepting comments … and wanted to put up some positive guidelines. This was a great help!

]]> By: isabella mori http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-417973 isabella mori Wed, 19 Mar 2008 13:47:12 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-417973 @marc, i feel the same way about people who spam so i want to take them as seriously as i can. actually, i have a bit of a fascination with spammers ... :) @wendi "i usually don't have anything to add to the conversation" - that's a challenge to me! would love to talk to you about that ... yes, i really want to have as much conversation as possible. @jael "standard of professional communication" - i hadn't thought of that connection but yes, you're right. (i guess it shows that we used to work together :) @john - speaking heart to heart, that's what it's all about. thank you! wish i'd have throught of that - i'd have made it the headline! @nancy - as you know, i've worked in vancouver's downtown eastside (our inner city). indeed, my thoughts on this are informed by a similar church, where they don't have "security" people but "hospitality workers". a change of words can mean a change of heart ... and this is spooky - here's a big confession. i've never been comfortable with the term "counsellor" or "psychotherapist". when i worked in the downtown eastside, i used to joke that i was like the village priest. the nice one, hopefully. the doddering old, slightly eccentric guy who'd not only hear people's stories but who'd also, eat, cry, and dig ditches with them. @marc, i feel the same way about people who spam so i want to take them as seriously as i can. actually, i have a bit of a fascination with spammers … :)

@wendi “i usually don’t have anything to add to the conversation” – that’s a challenge to me! would love to talk to you about that … yes, i really want to have as much conversation as possible.

@jael “standard of professional communication” – i hadn’t thought of that connection but yes, you’re right. (i guess it shows that we used to work together :)

@john – speaking heart to heart, that’s what it’s all about. thank you! wish i’d have throught of that – i’d have made it the headline!

@nancy – as you know, i’ve worked in vancouver’s downtown eastside (our inner city). indeed, my thoughts on this are informed by a similar church, where they don’t have “security” people but “hospitality workers”. a change of words can mean a change of heart …

and this is spooky – here’s a big confession. i’ve never been comfortable with the term “counsellor” or “psychotherapist”. when i worked in the downtown eastside, i used to joke that i was like the village priest. the nice one, hopefully. the doddering old, slightly eccentric guy who’d not only hear people’s stories but who’d also, eat, cry, and dig ditches with them.

]]> By: Nancy http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-417680 Nancy Wed, 19 Mar 2008 05:18:13 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-417680 This reminds me of a fine balance we face at my parish church in the dtes. Everyone is truly welcome. Perhaps even especially people who don't look so good, who may smell bad, and who "live outside". There are a number of, shall we say, disrupters: the guy who I affectionately refer to as the Ranter, who sometimes sits at the front, and when moved, stands up and briefly rants at the rest of us. the woman who right in the middle of the service walked straight up to the virgin mary, split open a bag full of oranges and prostrated herself on the floor. the perfectly-respectable-woman who periodically attends and (turets?) utters swear words under her breath including the g-d words. All this is breaks the norms, for sure, but is absolutely ok. Then there are some who cross some invisible line - a bit too aggressive. who pees on the floor. who doesn't simply disrupt, but starts to take over the show. those ones, a priest will discretely (insofar as possible) escort out. You're like the priest. At the end of the day, this is your show. You get to decide who is simply breaking norms, and who, for the sake of the community as well as him/herself is best escorted off the blog. <em>Nancy's last blog post..<a href='http://nancyzimmerman.com/2008/03/18/freebie-or-nearly-wednesday-free-rem-online-an-amazing-music-festival-in-pemberton-and-the-xfiles-set-sale/'>Freebie (or nearly) Wednesday: free REM online, an amazing music festival in Pemberton, and the XFiles set sale</a></em> This reminds me of a fine balance we face at my parish church in the dtes. Everyone is truly welcome. Perhaps even especially people who don’t look so good, who may smell bad, and who “live outside”. There are a number of, shall we say, disrupters: the guy who I affectionately refer to as the Ranter, who sometimes sits at the front, and when moved, stands up and briefly rants at the rest of us. the woman who right in the middle of the service walked straight up to the virgin mary, split open a bag full of oranges and prostrated herself on the floor. the perfectly-respectable-woman who periodically attends and (turets?) utters swear words under her breath including the g-d words. All this is breaks the norms, for sure, but is absolutely ok. Then there are some who cross some invisible line – a bit too aggressive. who pees on the floor. who doesn’t simply disrupt, but starts to take over the show. those ones, a priest will discretely (insofar as possible) escort out.

You’re like the priest. At the end of the day, this is your show. You get to decide who is simply breaking norms, and who, for the sake of the community as well as him/herself is best escorted off the blog.

Nancy’s last blog post..Freebie (or nearly) Wednesday: free REM online, an amazing music festival in Pemberton, and the XFiles set sale

]]> By: JohnD http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-417671 JohnD Wed, 19 Mar 2008 05:02:25 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-417671 These guidelines are extremely helpful. My work involves mediating public policy issues, and the groundrules we use are quite similar. I had not thought of the comment page in those terms before, but it is clearly a forum for dialogue. People need to have awareness of the impact of what they say on the direction of the conversation, especially on mental health sites - but really in any setting where the goal is, as you point out, to remember truth and hopefully reach a bit of it through genuine dialogue. Dialogue becomes real when people speak heart to heart rather than just head to head. Thanks for bringing these ideas forward. I'll use some version of them on my blog as well. John D <em>JohnD's last blog post..<a href='http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/storiedmind/~3/252570036/lincolns-adaptation-to-depression'>Lincoln's Adaptation to Depression</a></em> These guidelines are extremely helpful. My work involves mediating public policy issues, and the groundrules we use are quite similar. I had not thought of the comment page in those terms before, but it is clearly a forum for dialogue. People need to have awareness of the impact of what they say on the direction of the conversation, especially on mental health sites – but really in any setting where the goal is, as you point out, to remember truth and hopefully reach a bit of it through genuine dialogue. Dialogue becomes real when people speak heart to heart rather than just head to head.

Thanks for bringing these ideas forward. I’ll use some version of them on my blog as well.

John D

JohnD’s last blog post..Lincoln’s Adaptation to Depression

]]> By: jael http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-417331 jael Tue, 18 Mar 2008 17:29:50 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-417331 your aspirations are my standard of professional communication. You have done a stellar job of keeping the commercial/mass-produced comments from ruining the flavour of the conversation. I was not aware that you had been dealing with those kinds of comments until now. I comment when I feel moved to add to the conversation. Just now I realize how tight the parameters are. For example, this comment is a bit longer than I am comfortable with, but I am keeping it. <em>jael's last blog post..<a href='http://rilwyn.livejournal.com/4222.html'>rabbit hole day</a></em> your aspirations are my standard of professional communication. You have done a stellar job of keeping the commercial/mass-produced comments from ruining the flavour of the conversation. I was not aware that you had been dealing with those kinds of comments until now. I comment when I feel moved to add to the conversation. Just now I realize how tight the parameters are. For example, this comment is a bit longer than I am comfortable with, but I am keeping it.

jael’s last blog post..rabbit hole day

]]> By: Wendi http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-417277 Wendi Tue, 18 Mar 2008 14:59:41 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-417277 I think your aspirations are admirable. I don't comment often because I usually don't have anything to add to the conversation, and because I can't say whatever you said better than you have said it. ;-) I'm always interested in what's been said, though, and I think the comments add a lot, so putting as much thought into them as into the post itself is worthwhile. Nice to encourage the exchange, rather than simply imparting information one way. I think your aspirations are admirable. I don’t comment often because I usually don’t have anything to add to the conversation, and because I can’t say whatever you said better than you have said it. ;-) I’m always interested in what’s been said, though, and I think the comments add a lot, so putting as much thought into them as into the post itself is worthwhile. Nice to encourage the exchange, rather than simply imparting information one way.

]]> By: Marc Olmsted http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-417268 Marc Olmsted Tue, 18 Mar 2008 14:18:46 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-417268 We hold these aspirations to be self-evident--but also, that all comments are not created equal, and some need to be deleted, without being taken personally because they've been sent to a million other sites as well. I try to remember that behind every spam is someone trying to make a buck, and probably, in Ukraine or Nigeria or Romania, coming from a place where they have known poverty and vowed never to experience it again. If this means they cause some (relatively) rich Westerners some irritation but one of out 10.000 actually buy their pills or play their game, then I don't think it cause them to lose sleep. I try to focus on the family that perhaps is being fed or clothed, even as I curse the complete lack of civic-mindedness and waste of time. We hold these aspirations to be self-evident–but also, that all comments are not created equal, and some need to be deleted, without being taken personally because they’ve been sent to a million other sites as well.
I try to remember that behind every spam is someone trying to make a buck, and probably, in Ukraine or Nigeria or Romania, coming from a place where they have known poverty and vowed never to experience it again. If this means they cause some (relatively) rich Westerners some irritation but one of out 10.000 actually buy their pills or play their game, then I don’t think it cause them to lose sleep. I try to focus on the family that perhaps is being fed or clothed, even as I curse the complete lack of civic-mindedness and waste of time.

]]> By: Evan http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/comment-page-1/#comment-416934 Evan Tue, 18 Mar 2008 00:54:21 +0000 http://www.moritherapy.org/article/comment-aspirations/#comment-416934 Excellent aspirations. Full agreement from me. (I don't claim to have always lived up to the aspirations.) <em>Evan's last blog post..<a href='http://wellbeingandhealth.net/articles/awareness-cures-what-i-have-learned-from-gestalt-3/'>Awareness Cures: What I have learned from Gestalt #3</a></em> Excellent aspirations. Full agreement from me. (I don’t claim to have always lived up to the aspirations.)

Evan’s last blog post..Awareness Cures: What I have learned from Gestalt #3

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