change therapy

if you’re new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. thanks for visiting!what is guilt? we usually think that guilt is a feeling. however, it is not a primary emotion like fear or happiness, sadness or even shame. it is more complex. when joe feels guilt over […]

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the other day someone said that i was a picky eater. this was after telling them that i can’t have any dairy products in the morning – it gives me bad cramps. i was hurt that i was called picky and defended myself by saying that it wasn’t that i was rejecting their food, or […]

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a few years ago, i put together this list of definitions to answer the question:
what is learning?
acquisition of knowledge
· gain some understanding that we have been able to commit to memory
· a seal of approval on particular thoughts and feelings that we want to stay with us in the […]

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“Study Shows Nearly Half Of Eating Disorder Patients Self-Harm”
this is the title of an article in medicalnews. it made me stop and think because it shows a certain line of thinking about

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addthis_title = ‘understanding+self-harm’;
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in my last blog entry i talked about how the words “i don’t know” often stem not from not-knowing, but from information overload. the knowledge gets buried in a mass of (often unpleasant) information.
the second reason why we sometimes feel we don’t know the solution to our problems is because we might have a […]

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“i don’t know …”
when we’re confronted with a difficult issue, we often come up with these words, “i don’t know”.
“why do i always end up drinking more than i wanted? i just don’t know.”
“i wish i could change how i talk to my son. we always seem to end up fighting. i […]

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okay, so let’s see what we can make of all the information and opinions we’ve gathered in the last few days about the subject of “making” someone feel something.
in the first part, we concluded that it’s not possible to make anyone feel anything, as evidenced by the fact that when a teacher says something to […]

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(the following entry is a retreat of something i posted back in january. when i transferred my blog over from blogger, for some reason none of the material from january made it over here. so i’ll post some of the posts anew.)
a while ago i skulked around the internet again, using wordtracker to […]

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the other day i received an email from a friend. it started with the ominous “please read and pass on”. immediately my antennae went up; in my experience, 95% of such emails turn out to be hoaxes.
the friend of mine who passed the email on to me is an ex teacher, has an […]

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okay, here is something that i absolutely have to get off my chest:
what goes on in the head of spammers?
and what, specifically, is the process of coming up with these amazing names, like
abhorrence p. versifying
amateurism g. causal
ambiguities u. magnetos
annihilation j. silliness
arnulfo mcleod
(more at the end of this entry – i don’t want to spam your […]

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just as hope can be seen from opposing viewpoints, i think the term “enough” can be seen from different points of view as well.
let’s take these three examples:
“you don’t need another blanket, joe. it’s not that cold – these two blankets are enough.”
“don’t worry about making every page perfect. remember, it’s a draft; what you […]

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hope is one of those things that can go both ways. let me first tell you about what i believe to be the negative aspects of hope, and then about the bright side of hope.
the carrot and the stick
hope can be the carrot of the famous “carrot and the stick”. it can be that […]

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“i have this young man sitting here, george. i’d like to send him over to you. he’s a real sweetheart but he’s got a problem and some things got a bit messed up.” my friend tessa at the neighbourhood church didn’t tell me more than that; probably he was sitting right beside her […]

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back in april, i said this in regard to a blog entry on obesity research:
the more healthy i live, the more understanding i have for people for whom health is not such a great priority, or who have chosen to focus on different areas of improving their health than i have. i have some hunches […]

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i don’t have anorexia but i am intrigued by how close i feel to people who have this experience. there is a way in which i understand the desire to control one’s life to such a high degree. “my body will not tell me when to eat! i am in charge of […]

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