Comments on: anorexia talk – for people recovering from anorexia (3)

By: alex

alex — Wed, 09 Mar 2011 00:31:04 +0000

hi Calli,
i think you were very brave to post on here and take the first step to trying to recover. i, too, am just starting to try to recover.
i think that the first thing that is the most important thing to have is a close friend or two to confide in.. it’s definitely hard to deal with something like this alone. try to talk to someone who you feel will understand. i know that it’s very hard to try and tell people, but if you find someone who you can trust, it will help you so much in the long term.
also.. i know how bad it feels to start eating and feel like you won’t be able to stop. your body needs the food so much, that it just wants to take it any chance it gets.
one way to stop feeling like this, is to eat three small meals every day, with little snacks in between. you don’t have to eat unhealthily – but you do have to try and get every food group in. your body is probably very vitamin deficient. generally you should probably eat about 2000 calories a day.. i know it seems like a lot, but work up to it. try to eat at least every four hours.
i know it seems like your mom is trying to force you to over eat, but to someone with an ed, a normal amount of food seems like a LOT. trust your mom.. she had an eating disorder and overcame it and she is healthy now, so she knows what to do.
i know you can overcome this, we all can
keep hope! i know you can do this.

By: Calli

Calli — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 06:12:22 +0000

Hi everyone
I am new here but i figured this is a good place to get advice from those who understand and share my feelings without having someone get mad at me for them. I have been suffering suffering anorexia. I’m 5’6 and weigh about 90 LBs. My mom suffered from anorexia when she was my age too and is trying to help me but it always seems like she is trying to make me over eat and forcing me to eat which makes me frustrated with her and we end of fighting over it. She used to tell me i was over weight before i became anorexic and now she wants me to eat all these foods she used to tell me to cut back on like chips and french fries and sweets. I dont know what to do. I used to enjoy food and not care what i ate or when i ate it. Now i count every calorie and look up every food that i eat.

I do want to get better and be able to just enjoy food again but when i eat i feel like i wont be able to stop. I also dont know how much to eat to start gaining weight without over eating. Im so scared to gain weight and not look skinny anymore but i know i am killing my body and this needs to be done. My mom is scared to death that i am just killing my organs and she crys almost everyday. i want to get better for her and myself Someone please help me

By: Small-town girly

Small-town girly — Thu, 13 Jan 2011 09:07:50 +0000

Dear Kate
I’m probably not the best person to give you advice, but I understand EXACTLY how you feel. I don’t know if this is of any help, but when I do binge, I always tell myself that tomorrow is a new day, I’ll do better. Your body burns ALOT of calories while you sleep, so you can literally take it one day at a time. One binge is not going to make your body gain weight. What I’ve also taken to doing is adding foods to my ‘anorexic diet’ systematically, one at a time. At first you’ll feel guilty about that cup of coffee after lunch or the chocolate biscuit at tea but onece your mind accepts that it’s part of your diet, you won’t even count the calories. And then you do it with a next food and so forth. Don’t be so hard on yourself – it is going to take time and you are going to have relapses. but the most important thing is to not let it get you down. Remember, you’re not back to square one! You’ve just taken a step back. So take that step forward again! What we have to overcome isn’t easy – chain smokers learn to just avoid cigarettes all together, alcoholics need to stay away from alcohol. BUT WE CAN”T JUST CUT OUT FOOD! Thus the problem stares you in the face three times a day! And cut yourself some slack – you’ve already taken steps against anorexia, so you’re half way there. Tomorrow is a new day forgive and forget

By: Small-town girly

Small-town girly — Thu, 13 Jan 2011 08:42:20 +0000

Hi guys!
I’m new around here I suffered from anorexia about a year-and-a-half to two years back. I loved the feeling of losing wight and people commenting on it – it was like a drug. Until my parents sat me down and showed me pictures – holiday, school, you name it – and I saw myself through their eyes. However I’m quick with my mouth and I’ve convinced my parents all is well – I don’t need counseling. I’m still struggling a bit – I’m at a normal weight, but my mind still tells me I’m fat. Is it possible to defeat this on my own? My parents are very supportive, but they don’t realise what’s going on in my head. I haven’t read ALL the responses so I don’t know if this question’s been answered. I also have one VERY important question that’s seriously bothering me: It’s been more than two years since I’ve had my period. Will it come back or have I scarred my body for life? I’m so scared I won’t be able to have children one day!!!!

By: Kate

Kate — Sun, 09 Jan 2011 23:57:50 +0000

hey guys, it’s been awhile but I’m not doing so good.
For awhile I thought i was doing good and that I was finally getting control of my anorexia but at this moment, I’m not so sure. For the longest time, I was beginning to thnk that I was over my fear of “forbidden” foods. But tonight, I went on what felt like a binge so I’m sure it was. I ate so many “forbidden” foods and I’m not sure why and now I’m scared. I am so scared that I’m going to gain a bunch of weight from it and I’ll feel worse about myself.
I need someone to talk to.. there’s no one where I live that understands what I am going through and so I keep all my feelings to myself. I don’t know why I continued to eat the food even after I was full. Like what was I trying to prove and to who??? It was like I was telling myself HA! See there I can eat that and you can’t stop me. But really that is so pathetic! Help me guys… I don’t know what to do or think. I want to restrict so badly and I had even thought about purging… :S

By: Amy:(

Amy:( — Wed, 29 Dec 2010 20:38:55 +0000

Hey.. I have recovered from anorexia for a year now. However now I seem to be eating far too much that i feel sick:( It is so annoyin..im feelin realy fat again.. Then I dnt eat 4 a wile then eat 2 much. Im sick of this:(

By: aliyah

aliyah — Mon, 20 Dec 2010 10:09:34 +0000

ema, i have been where you are. I got to that ideal weight, and honestly i didnt feel good but when i told my bf and mum and dad, they were so hapyp and i knew then this was the right place to be, its not healthy in any way to be underweight. If its easier you shouldnt weight yourself, i dont anymore, i go by how clothes fit me and try to remain a stable weight.
you wont get fat , that was my concern for years, and through all those years all i did was get anorexia and bulimia and now i am over them, because the fear was irrational. Its not true, if you eat well ( 3 regular meals), and try to follow your body hunger cues , which i know can be hard you wont get fat. try to get to your ideal weight and then maintain it.
Often the thoughts and cognitions take longer than the actual physical side to ”heal”. good luck x

By: Ema

Ema — Thu, 16 Dec 2010 09:43:13 +0000

@ AmyB

Hi Amy, my name is Ema (almost the same )
I’ m in the same recovery phase as you are. Well, I have some questions…
Are you afraid of reaching your goal weight? Because I’m also very close to that point, but I just cannot stand the thought of seeing those numbers… How do you cope with that? Please help me, because if I don’t reach it , and ACCEPT IT, it will cause further problems.
It has already cost me my mum’s patience and trust, and I don’t think she can’t handle it anymore… I’m tired of feeling depressed, waking up in the morning hating myself and constantly diminishing my achievements… I have done everything, everything there is to be done in the outside world… Still, I feel so empty.
I have talked to my therapist, but it helped me to a certain point. I have to break out from this never-ending cycle. Sometimes, I succeed in fighting it, but I always return to the same pattern… Controlling my weight has become my main priority, and even though I realize it is the road to nothingness, I’m still not able to shake it off.
Do you feel like I do?

By: Ally

Ally — Sun, 28 Nov 2010 14:28:00 +0000

hey to everyone on this. I just wanted to say i know what u have all been through. i am an example of recovery working, i had anoreia and bulimia and believe me all you should try your best to recover. Get healthy, get happy.
a skinny unhealthy body is not a good luck, plus there are so many long term consequences, you dont want to ruin yyour life! so eat regularly, vary the food, and try not to purge, restrict and so on. your body has to trust u, so feed it

By: AmyB

AmyB — Sun, 14 Nov 2010 14:18:20 +0000

Hey girls (Sorry for the cheery smile, I know most of you are probably thinking “fuck off” right about now)
I’ve suffered from anorexia for years now; I relapsed last year, and now I’m well into my road of recovery, once again. It has been about 3-4 months of healthy eating habits. That seems like an eternity compared to the years I spent starving myself. Ironic, huh?
It’s hard, as all of you are finding. It’s insane how eating seems so much harder than not eating.
But I’d like to let you in on some secrets:
- I started to be open with my mom about my eating disorder. It helped ease the anger she felt about why I wouldn’t eat (It’s hard having your mom snap at you in front of company to eat your food, when you are having anxiety just looking at it). We came to some pretty reasonable compromises. I eventually went beyond those compromises (long after) to eating more than we agreed upon. My mom then told many people (at first I was mad) but when they came for dinner, I noticed I was getting more support and advice than weird looks. It made me feel like an insider, not an outsider.
- When I eat a big meal, I feel really shocked and surprised that me (a starver of many years) could eat something like that. So I dive into my school books or start on a book or something that will highly distract me for hours, until the feeling of fullness and uncomfortableness has gone away. The feeling still comes, but I’ve learned to suppress it. Now after I’ve eaten and studied for hours (or something more fun) I start to feel my tummy growl for more. It’s kind of fun to get my appetite back.
- I’m still a health NUT. Recovering from an eating disorder doesn’t mean you have to go and eat all the crap your brothers and friends do. We have an advantage, we know what we do and do not want to eat! Take control of your eating in a new and improved way; I’ve started to eat whole grain instead of whole wheat/white, and tonnes of vegetables. Most clinicians will say that you should start to eat with your family, what they eat, in their portions; I agree, but if my family is having unhealthy things that won’t improve my health at all, I’ll make something separate, like whole grain pasta, vegetables in sauce, chicken, and chocolate milk. Then I’ll sit down and eat with them. Of course, this won’t work unless you make an appropriate portion and eat it all.
- Set a goal weight. It will take a while to get there. (I’m still not at mine; very close though) To lessen the fear that you will lose control and eat until you bust, this will control your eating in a new way. Once you get to your goal weight, practise healthy eating habits by trying to stay there; this doesn’t mean going under! And try not to panic if you go over.
- I still worry. When I get on the scale, I still think hard about my weight. But again, try and distract yourself. Once you are hungry again, the number won’t seem nearly as big.
- Don’t way yourself too often! It’s annoying, especially with fluctuating numbers. I weigh twice a week maximum.
- My hair is still falling out, but growing in on the sides. Progress is showing!!
- I have so many more. But I need breakfast!
Let me know if anyone has any questions; i’m not fully recovered or any more of an expert than you guys, but sometimes new opinions open up some eyes.